1. Don’t wait for a man to be a success: I was very lucky to meet and marry a very patient, genuinely great guy who completely supports my writing career. We are lucky to have a very happy relationship. However, not every romantic partner is as understanding as my husband happens to be. If you genuinely would love to have a career in whatever it is you are interested in, don’t wait for someone else – GO DO IT. NOW. If the person really loves you, he’ll follow you. Don’t wait for him to get his shit together; get your shit together first and find out what it takes to be a success for yourself.
2. If someone, man or woman, is beating you up, YOU ARE IN DANGER and you need to get the hell out of dodge: Seriously, I shouldn’t need to bring up any statistics, etc., to get this point across. Violence is not really about violence, it’s about CONTROL. It only escalates over the years and gets much, much worse. Get the hell out; abandon your belongings if you must. It’s just stuff; you can always buy new stuff. There is NOTHING worth dying for. If you are doing the hitting or “provoking” someone into hitting you on purpose, GET OUT of the relationship immediately. It’s just not healthy and you need to go into therapy to figure yourself out. This is not said out of judgment; this is said out of concern for mental health. Violence engenders violence and there is no reason for it, ever, pure and simple. 

On a serious note, if you are in a violent relationship, please visit this web site for some helpful resources: http://www.thehotline.org/

Emily Carney is a writer, space enthusiast, and creator of the This Space Available space blog, published since 2010. In January 2019, Emily’s This Space Available blog was incorporated into the National Space Society’s blog. The content of Emily’s blog can be accessed via the This Space Available blog category.

Note: The views expressed in This Space Available are those of the author and should not be considered as representing the positions or views of the National Space Society.